we all came with varying degrees of comfort on the snow with stupid little board(s) attached to our feet..but none of us had ever snowboarded. now, why...you might ask...would a group of 30 somethings to 50 somethings think that learning this now would be a good idea? um...well, i don't really have an answer for that! teehee... but, i actually loved it!!! ...sucked at it, but loved it!!
we went snowboarding for the 3rd time yesterday, the last of our package deal....and it was FANTASTIC!!! before...it was just fun. but i finally got it! AND got over my trauma too! see...when i was in college, i went skiing for the first time. and i went with a friend who was a great skier...so after letting me plow my way down a bunny hill a couple of times, she pronounced me ready to go on the mountain and promptly took me up a hill that i had ZERO reason to be on! it was too far advanced and it literally took me about 2 hours to get down it. and most of that i spent sliding down on my bum while much better, tho pissed off, skiers flew past me while i was in their way. so, remembering that fear....this time i've been reluctant to go on the mountain. ...ok, yes...actually i've just been refusing! everytime it was mentioned, there were cold sweats, butterflies in the stomach, a faint nauseous feeling! but...the bunny hill was getting boring (and strenuous...because its not very big, which means more unclipping and walking up the hill, and reclipping, and doing my 5 second run, to then unclip and do it all over again!! YIKES! )
so...i decide that i'm going to take the afternoon class and hope that i get an instructor that will take me up the mountain and lovingly coach me down it! :D hehe.... trisha in the meantime is zipping up and down the mountain like a pro. well, okay...not a pro, but certainly making me look like a big weenie on the 5 second wonder hill! teehee... so...i tromp my self up to the class area (because you really can only "tromp" in snowboarding boots...well, and swish...but the swishing is because of all the water proof gear that i am bundled into that adds like 50lbs to your girth! ugh!!!) anywho...i tromp-swish my way to the beginners section and tell the instructor i see (Old Guy) that i've had two lessons already, but i haven't been up the hill (meaning the "buttercup" run which is the not a bunny hill, but not a real "mountain" either!) Old Guy stares at me speechless for a moment and then repeats "you haven't been up the hill??" "yes," i state thinking, of course i'm an chickenshitidiot, don't rub it in! Old Guy hollers over (so that EVERYone can hear) "we have a beyond-beginner over here" which gets the attention of another instructor. this one is a tall, very cute young guy who i quickly realize is from australia when he starts talking. GREAT...a Cute Young Aussie that i can be humiliated in front of!! remember...i paid for this humiliation! anyway, Cute Young Aussie says with elitest scorn..."so you haven't been up the hill" i think, yes...could we PLEASE keep repeating that in unbelief so that i feel like more of a dork, thank you! i quickly decide to start justifying and tell him i have trauma from my skiing experience and tell him the story. ...he's unimpressed.... so, two other gals join us and wouldn't you know it, they have only had one lesson each and they have BOTH been up/down the "hill" once. huh.
so Cute Young Aussie tells us to grab our gear and we head off towards the bunny hill, which happens to also be located near the lift to the Buttercup run. (aka...the hill) but he passes the bunny hill and heads straight for the lift!! UGH.... at this point, any and all of the former knowledge that i had acquired decided to promptly leave my brain and i started falling all over the place!! no seriously...i couldn't even stand upright for some reason?!?!?! Cute Young Aussie and the other two were waiting for me at the lift and i'm sure he was wondering if i'd actually ever even seen a snowboard before this moment! sheesh.... so i finally get over there and he rapidly tells us instructions for how to get on/off the lift which i only heard bits and pieces of because i was winded (and trying to not look it) as i tried not to panic about going up the hill, in order to go down the hill, all the while trying to remain upright! and he's speaking fast with an accent, so i feel vindicated...kinda. anyway...i then catch pieces of something that sounds like, "if you don't [empty space] then you will fall off the lift because [empty space] and it will yank you down." er...what?? but by the time it computed that i had missed some vital statements, Cute Young Aussie was on the lift and off. GRRRRRRRRR so much for the sensitive coach!
i made it on the lift okay; the exiting was quite a bit less spectacular....or well, more spectacular depending on which side you are on!! teehee... there really is just no easy way to exit a moving seat onto a slippery icy snowy embankment while having one foot strapped onto a very cumbersome board that weighs approx. 4lbs or so (not to mention the extra weight of the boots too!) and look at all graceful! lol oh well...at least i can say i'm not the only one....it seems more people fall off the ski lift than actual exit it! it takes me forever, again, to get over to our little group since i fall numerous times and seriously...did they REALLY have to move THAT far away from the lift?? so, i'm all in a tizzy to be angry at the elitist Cute Young Aussie as he is watching me in condesention when the most amazing thing happens....he becomes a teacher and TOTALLY started walking me step by step through what i needed to do! he mostly ignored the other girls (which, i felt only mild guilt over since they clearly were doing so much better than me anyway!) and spent most of the time holding onto me and helping me get the feel for how to control the board by shifting my weight and toe/heel angles. fairly quickly i got the hang of it and Cute Young Aussie continued to give me great and very helpful tips and i made it down the hill in about 20 minutes and with only a few spills! 2 more times up and down......the 3rd of which i managed to stay upright as i came off the lift for about 5 seconds!! meaning....at least i got out of the way of the next people off the lift! hehe.... he did lots of praising, which i basked in...because now he was no longer elitist condesending Cute Young Aussie, but patient sweet Cute Young Aussie!!!! ahhh...how the perspective can change!!
anywho...after three trips i was done for as my legs were trembling with the effort of it all! more praising from Patient Sweet Cute Young Aussie, and i went on my merry way.....
....to wake up this morning in such excruciating pain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH-MY-HEAVENS! HELLOOO....clearly, i am not 25 anymore!! my 34 year old body doth protest LOUDLY with all the tensing, falling, crunching, tweeking i mananged to do yesterday! not only am i sore all over my body...even in parts i didn't know i still had muscles...but i did actually tweek my knee during my under-pressure-forgetting-how-to-be-upright-falling mode! well...really more of a splitting mode as my leg that was attached to the board went one way, and my free leg went the opposite direction! oh well...whats a little case of a torn MCL when it comes to snowboarding adventures?!!? ...thats what insurance and PT is for, right??? teehee
i am actually kinda sad now that i spent 9 years up in alaska and never learned how to do this! after yesterday....even with all the drama. once i finally "got it", its like it almost jumped into my blood! last night as i was going to sleep, i was literally snowboarding in my head thinking about angles and how to control the board in this direction or that direction...etc etc. i could probably have enjoyed living in alaska in the winter if i had this to do!! teehee.... who knew!
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